Last evening, my father, died a good and peaceful death. Dad had been suffering from severe respiratory distress and other complications due to the acute myelogenous leukemia that was slowly but firmly diminishing his physical strength. He courageously made the decision to stop medical care and begin palliative care at the hospice center located at the Mayflower in Winter Park, Florida. We moved him into hospice just last Wednesday.
In spite of the aching sadness of reaching the finality of his death, the days I spent with him last week were among the greatest gifts a son could receive from his father. I have always believed that it is the dying who are the true bearers of wisdom to the living and Dad certainly met that conviction over this past year and in his final days. Rob and I were able to have wonderful conversations about the journey of faith with Dad as he continued to open up for us the power of John’s Gospel quoting by memory numerous passages and explaining the significance of the words “eternal life.” I’ve written about an earlier conversation I had with Dad about John’s Gospel here. He has given me much to think about (and more than likely, preach about) in the days and months to come.
The other night, as Rob and I were praying the office of Compline with Dad, he paused at the Song of Simeon,
“Lord, you now have set your servant free to go in peace as you have promised; for these eyes of mine have seen the Savior whom you have prepared for all the world to see.”
He told us that this Benedictine office hymn from Luke’s Gospel, was meant to help the monks (and now the faithful) keep death always before them (memento mori ) and to give thanks for the wholeness God has granted them to know in their own lives by placing their trust in Jesus Christ. In this hymn, Simeon reflects over the course of his human journey, and in his meeting with the child Jesus, he knows he has encountered everything that matters. As he holds Jesus in his arms, Simeon is ready to die–ready to leave this human journey in promised peace. Clearly, Dad found eloquence in that hymn as he anticipated his own departing.
In Jesus Christ, we have encountered all that matters. That is not something I believe. It is what I know. I know it because the transforming life and vision of Jesus were visible in my Dad’s life–through his joys and in his sorrows, through his gifts and in his disappointments, through the thousands of lives he touched in the course of his priestly ministry, and in his gentle care and compassion for his wife and two sons. My father gave me so much in this life but the greatest treasure is surely the gift of his enduring faith.
The office of Compline now takes on fresh relevance and comfort for me. I will forever hear the echo of Dad’s voice the last time we prayed these words together:
“The Lord Almighty grant us a peaceful night and a perfect end.”
Dad, God answered your prayer. I will love you always.
Rick+
{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }
Wow. Thank you and God bless you.
Dear Father Rick –
You don’t know how often I think about you and take strength from you. I know I’m just a “C & E” (“Christmas and Easter”) in the sense of coming to the building, and feel conflicted about it, but I devour everything you write. Your pictures and words about your Dad are beautiful. What an incredible family of origin you have, as well as having your marriage. You and Debbie are a couple worth emulating. Remember when the Fall Festival had a dunking booth? Debbie dunked you, but before doing so, she said, “I love you Honey.” It’s so hard to lose a daddy but it’s great that you’ve had so much love in your life. I’m adding mine. ~~ Ruth D.
Dear Rick,
Surely you had an invaluable treasure on earth in your father. The comfort you must feel in knowing the gifts he shared with you as he traveled His journey in life. His continued love and presence will remain close in your heart and will be passed on enriching many other lives.
Peace and Love,
Todd & Luz Meloy
Father Rick -
Thank you for the gifts you give us! We are so blessed that you offer – and that we can receive – your insightful reflections on the greatest intimacies of life as you experience them in your own life. I am often challenged to find the courage for identifying and interpreting the depths of life. Thank you for the guideposts you so graciously share , which encourage me on!
You and your family will remain in my thoughts and prayers, with my deepest gratitude for what you all have done to make our world richer in spirit.
Godspeed to you and yours as you travel this week.
Rick and Rob – Please accept our deepest condolences over the loss of your father. We have many fond and cherished memories of his ministry at St James. Your dad was indeed a man of faith who not only spoke the word, but lived it out in his daily life. Without doubt, through his teaching and ministry he touched and transformed the lives many including our family. He made Scripture become real and alive and powerful. He was faithful in his teaching of the word of God and would not compromise the truth of the Gospel. Our prayers are with you all. Please remember us to your mom. Faithfully in Christ – Dottie and Bob Tedesco
Dear Father Rick,
I’m sorry you lost your great dad. Your story makes me miss and appreciate my dad all over again. Thank you for sharing with us about him, so we can know this man who gave us our own beloved Father Rick. – Susan Chait
I am the mother of Nancy Khattab. She is marrying Steve Ritter. They have been meeting with you. I have not met you myself, but after reading about your dad and your realtionship I feel very fortunate that you are the one that will be advising them on the value of marriage and family life.
My family sends condolences to you and your family.
Margie, Mokhtar,Joey and Nancy Khattab
Rick, what beautiful & inspiring words. Bob Tedesco posted a comment on Facebook about your father’s passing and then sent me the link to your blog. Jamie & I join many others in remembering your father so very fondly. And we send you our condolences & prayers for continued comfort & inspiration from the memory of his wonderful life in service to the Lord.
Blessings, greetings, love & prayers to you & your family from Jamie & Stacy Cowen
Rick, Rob, Julie and families,
We got a call today from Barbara’s sister in New Smyrna Beach, who’d seen David’s obituary in the Orlando Sentinel. He was a great example, teacher and friend, and he will be missed. His focus was always on the glory of God through his word, and his ministry touched the lives of many. We pray for the Lord’s blessings on you all as you gather at Trinity.
Rick,
I’m sorry to hear of the loss of your father, but I am grateful for your loving tribute to him here–it is a real blessing! Thank you.
Fr. Rick, you and your family are in out hearts and prayers. We were saddened to hear the news and pray that the memory of your father will sustain you in these days and the days to come. – Randy and Susan
Dear Fr. Rick,
You are remarkable– it is extraordinary that you can write words to extend comfort and faith to others while you are feeling the profound loss of a parent. Your tribute to your dad is lovely. Thank you for sharing and encouraging me to remember and to believe.
Sending love, prayers and always, gratitude.
Traveling mercies,
April Orr
Rick, Rob, Julie and families
With saddness and heartfelt prayers we enjoin the multitudes that knew so well the blessings that Reverend Lord has bestowed on his following
through his grace and loving kindness and we petition a host of Angels to be with The Rev. David Lord on his journey to be with his Lord. Peace be with you.
From Holy Comforter, Ronald, Laurie, Grey,Chase and Papa Mike
and Audrey and Andy Bergner.
Dear Fr. Rick:
Dad and I were so sorry to learn of the passing of your father. We truly understand the pain your family feels in his loss. I know your faith is strong and you are comforted by the fact that he is receiving his reward in being with the Lord. You and your brother are his living testimony in the Lord. You are all in our prayers during this time of profound loss.
Love In Him, Bill and Jackie Howe
Dear Rick:
My most heartfelt sympathy and love at this difficult time. I remember those days at St. James as truly “golden days” when I came to know what being a Christian truly is, and the shining example your father always provided. My thoughts and prayers are with your family. I know your dad is blazing a trail straight to Our Father’s side.
Diana Clayton
Dear Father Rick,
Thank you for sharing with us the tribute to your dad. What an extraordinary gift of love and faith he gave to you which you now share with us.
With sadness for your loss,
Ellen Holt